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Jokes! (26 posts)
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LemonDaisy
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Click for profile 		Will you please tell me some jokes that are actually funny? It totally counts if they're so terrible as to be funny. Laughing!

My friend and I are on this joke kick and google sucks compared to asking around. Go to it. Very Happy
quote / posted 07 June 2010 6:11 PM
LemonDaisy
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Click for profile 		OH COME ON
quote / posted 07 June 2010 7:00 PM
Saul
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Click for profile 		What pepper is known for being nosy?






Jalapeno Business (you have to pronounce "jalapeno" correctly to get it).
quote / posted 07 June 2010 7:24 PM
Saul
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Click for profile 		What do you do when you see a spaceman?




Park your car, man.
quote / posted 07 June 2010 7:27 PM
supporter graphic  Un-Jelli
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quoting: Saul
What pepper is known for being nosy?






Jalapeno Business (you have to pronounce "jalapeno" correctly to get it).



Had to say that one a few times to get it. But that was my own poor pronounciation. All I've got are super nerdy pickup lines.

Any math geeks might like: You are like sine, and I'm cosine, because together we make one!
quote / posted 07 June 2010 7:32 PM
MackLovesChachi
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Click for profile 		A woman finds her duck lying unconscious in her yard. She takes it to the vet and asks what's wrong with it.

The vet busts out his stethoscope and tells the woman that her duck is unfortunately dead.

She says "No! I want a second opinion!"

The vet calls in a cat, the cat walks around the duck, sniffs it once, and walks out.

The vet says "I'm really very sorry, but your duck is indeed dead."

The woman says "NO NO! One more test!"

The vet calls in a dog. The dog walks around the duck, sniffs it once, and walks out.

The vet says again, "I'm sorry ma'am, but your duck is dead.'

She finally accepts it, and asks what the cost of the visit will be.

The vet says it will be 3,000 dollars.

The woman is furious and demands to know why it is so much.

The vet says "If you would have listened the first time it would only be 200 dollars, but after the cat scan and the lab report, it's 3,000."


Ba dun ch.

[This post edited by MackLovesChachi on 07 June 2010 ]

quote / posted 07 June 2010 10:42 PM
WickidFreak
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Click for profile 		nice Smile i'm slow and didn't get saul's jokes...please, only make fun of me somewhat.
quote / posted 07 June 2010 10:51 PM
MackLovesChachi
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Click for profile 		Jalapeno business. All-up-in-yo-business.
quote / posted 07 June 2010 11:34 PM
sp00n3tt3
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Click for profile 		Young doctor is doing his first pelvic exam on a woman and is a little nervous and embarassed. To hide his embarassment, he begins whistling. The lady laughs suddenly and the doctor becomes worried "did I tickle you?" "no," she replied, "you're whistling 'I wish I was an Oscar Meyer Weiner"
quote / posted 08 June 2010 3:35 AM
LiquidSunshinefallsdown
(178k) Loved
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Click for profile 		Why doesn't smokey the bear have any children?


because every time his wife gets hot he beats her with a shovel.
quote / posted 08 June 2010 1:33 PM
thatbigpig
(583k) Adored
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Click for profile 		omg. the jalapeno one was HILARIOUS. yes!
quote / posted 08 June 2010 10:28 PM
OneAngryDwarf
(284k) Adored
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Click for profile 		Why did the baker have brown hands?





He kneaded a poo
quote / posted 09 June 2010 12:36 AM
supporter graphic  tripod2000
(368k) Adored
The Grand Daddy
Click for profile 		Why's Ginger Baker like British Rail Coffee?


It's shit without Cream.
quote / posted 09 June 2010 1:10 AM
LemonDaisy
(64k) Smitten
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Click for profile 		Knock knock.
quote / posted 09 June 2010 7:07 PM
MackLovesChachi
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Click for profile 		Who's there?
quote / posted 09 June 2010 7:21 PM
LemonDaisy
(64k) Smitten
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Click for profile 		Woo.
quote / posted 09 June 2010 8:15 PM
sp00n3tt3
(122k) Loved
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Click for profile 		Woo Who?
quote / posted 10 June 2010 1:01 AM
LemonDaisy
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Click for profile 		hahaha
quote / posted 10 June 2010 5:24 AM
MonkeyBoy
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Click for profile 		What do a bank and a woman have in common?




As soon as you pull out you lose interest.

Heh jk ladies. winking!
quote / posted 10 June 2010 2:25 PM
LemonDaisy
(64k) Smitten
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Click for profile 		I think the punchline was supposed to be "withdraw" lol.
quote / posted 10 June 2010 3:15 PM

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